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We’re going through a divorce – what is my child going through?

Seeing parents divorce no matter what the age of the child involved, can be an extremely upsetting time. They will probably feel sadness, loss, shock and even anger. Parents should be aware that their child will be going through these emotions, even if they don’t show it, and should encourage them to talk about their feelings as much as possible.


Maintaining a good relationship with your spouse during the divorce proceedings and after the divorce can help children to get through this emotionally unsettling time. Seeing that you are both agreed and that separation is what you both want can help children to feel more secure. Encouraging them to talk about their feelings and tell you if they are feeling angry or sad can also help to stop children feeling lonely.

Children will also worry about not seeing one or both parents as much as they used to and it can help to re-assure them that they will always be a top priority to both of you and you will see them regularly, even if you’re not living with them anymore.

Children can also obsess over whether the separation is actually permanent, so it is good to explain and re-enforce this at regular intervals to avoid any confusion. Reassuring them about what will happen during and after the divorce can also help to lessen any feelings of doubt or insecurity.

For more information on this subject please visit our Legal Library.


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