Over the past few months, our newspapers have been littered with stories of Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt’s divorce, many focusing on the impact it is having on their six children.
If you’re going through a divorce, with or without children, there are some simple things that you can do to help you through the Christmas period.
If you have children, it can be a contentious subject who they will spend Christmas with especially with a divorce looming. Nobody likes talking about Christmas too far in advance but opening up discussions with your spouse about this Christmas and next can save any arguments and stress further down the line.
Having these discussions well in advance not only gives you time to make arrangements, but also gives you more time to think about how you will spend any time that you don’t have your children with you.
It may be tempting to try not to think about what you’ll be doing for Christmas but by not planning your day ahead, you can find yourself at a loose end. Think about where you’ll be and what you’ll do, then write down a plan. It can also help to write down what you don’t want to let yourself think about during the Christmas period.
Planning ahead is especially important if your children will be with their other parent for all or part of Christmas.
Having a firm plan in place can give you a structure to help you get through what can be a difficult time.
If you can, organise to spend some or all of the Christmas period with your friends and family. Surrounding yourself with other people can help to take your mind off how different Christmas is for you this year.
Volunteering can also be a good way to take your mind off your divorce. Many local homeless shelters or animal rescue charities, for example, require volunteers to help out over the Christmas period and on Christmas Day.
Christmas time is full of family traditions, some built up over many years or even generations. Divorce means that you’ll need to make some changes but this need not be a bad thing.
Try to come up with at least one new tradition that you can incorporate into your day. This can help you to feel as if you are moving forwards with your life, by building in new things that are separate from your old relationship.
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